Addressing Unsafe Behavior

Feel Good Solutions that Work

It can be extremely embarrassing and feel incredibly lonely to have a child that is hurting others. And it's even worse when you feel like you've tried everything and you're completely powerless over their behavior.

From toddlers in the "hitting, biting and kicking phase" all the way to grown children exploding and/or causing harm... You are not alone and there is plenty you can do about it.

Children not growing out of these behaviors is affecting more and more families. While this isn't a topic that's typically comfortable to discuss, we talk about these tough topics all day long and would love to help.

Your child is trying to tell you something.

All behavior is communication.

Happy, fulfilled children that feel safe do not hurt others.

The more terrible your child's behavior, the more scared, alone and struggling they are.

Sometimes it's very apparent what they are communicating, and other times we might have absolutely no clue. At times these behaviors are developmentally and age appropriate, and eventually children most often grow out of them. And then there are other circumstances where they do not. Whether age appropriate or not, people can get hurt.

What can we do to help them stop hurting others?!

If we want these behaviors to subside then as parents, we help them identify their need and then show them how to meet that need and/or communicate more effectively and safely in getting help.

This process is a ton of work! It is labor intensive, time consuming and draining. And it can be incredibly disheartening when you don't see the results you'd like to see.

Even the best parents get overwhelmed and in desperation try parenting methods they otherwise would not.

While these tactics may work on some children, all of the following strategies negatively affect your child as well as can escalate their behaviors:

If and when these strategies do not work on your kids, consider yourself lucky that your child REFUSES to accept such detrimental and long-term damage.

Side effects of these sometimes well meaning parenting strategies and tactics include....

It shouldn't be hard to see how the above result in making our child's behavior worse.

Hopefully, you can see how this is not serving your child or helping them in any way.

Connection and respectful communication are solutions that work with ALL children of ALL ages.

However, they may be difficult to establish.

Sharing books with your child is an opportunity for connection and a reprieve from struggles. It's even better when the topics and content help us communicate and solve problems. Unfortunately though, many well-meaning books intended to address behavior actually create more problems.

You do NOT want books that...

We have found very few books out there that meet those requirements.

So, we curated our own list of books we use...

and happily share them with you here.

You may already own some of these. If not, you can find most in local libraries, or all are for sale on Amazon.

If you plan to purchase any, please consider supporting our efforts by purchasing through the provided links as we receive a percentage

at NO EXTRA COST to you. These are all Amazon Affiliate Links.

There are detrimental do's and don'ts when addressing unsafe behavior!

Raising Nonviolent Children™ is an online course that includes and addresses critical nuances on keeping yourself and others safe while empowering your children to replace unsafe and difficult behaviors with healthy communication.

While Raising Nonviolent Children™ is included in Our Mama Bear PREPARED™ Program, there are families that need a deeper dive, more content (including developing Safety Plans and deciding on when and how to get more serious help) and 1:1 support in applying the suggestions. This is when and where we recommend 1:1 Empowerment Coaching.


Reading for Mom

While there are a ton of books, programs and content to be found on addressing unwanted behavior in children, more and more families are finding that common solutions aren't working around concerns about explosive and/or unsafe or aggressive behaviors.

As experts in violence and prevention, we know that much of the attempted solutions in fact aggravate problems and make our kids behavior worse and even more unsafe. That's why it's so important to us that any family seeking help is able to find solutions here - even if they aren't interested in Rasing Nonviolent Children™.

We limit our recommendations to those solutions that are safe for all families.


These, too, are Amazon affiliate links. If you plan to purchase any, please consider supporting our efforts by purchasing through the provided links as we receive a percentage at NO EXTRA COST to you. These are all Amazon Affiliate Links.

More Help

Or maybe you're ready for the relief that comes from getting on a proven path that leads to a safe home?

Is your partner not on board? Not a problem.